As I drive pass the long line of cars turning into Sacramento State University I have a sudden realization - this is not me anymore.
I am no longer a student.
I'm not waiting to make something of my life. I'm not hoping for the bright future. I'm not getting ready to live my life.
I am DOING it.
The question that was there for my entire school career, has been answered:
I know what I love. I know what I'm passionate about. I know what I want from my life. And best of all - I'm LIVING it.
For 7 years I loved being a student.
Oh, how I loved classes, discussions, learning, endless questions, digging deep, and manipulating my brains into fatigue. I always said I will be a student for life.
now I realize that I was also hiding.
Hiding from constant questions - What are you gonna be when you grow up? - 'I'm a student! I'm still in the making.'
Hiding from a scary sense of 'I don't know' - if I'll just take another class, something will click. Something has to.
Hiding from stepping out into the big world, from claiming something of my own, from facing myself without a 'student' label.
I'm glad I left school knowing I have to follow my heart.
I'm glad I leaped into the unknown, having only my intuition as a guide.
I'm grateful for the infinite support of my incredibly generous partner, faithful friends, and ever-present teachers.
Because now, looking at the line of cars to the Sac State, I know - I am no longer becoming.